Saturday 7 April 2007

seeking sartorial solution

As a nineteen year old student on limited income, seeking sartorial solutions to a broken heart or to anything for that matter may seem odd. yet to me, it is the most natural of outlets for emotional stress. the creative element in dressing allows me a degree of eccentricity, emotional expression and outlet for frustrations and energy that might otherwise be bottled up.
Being at a prestigious, high pressure university, where everything is focussed on the contents of your mind, there is a surprising freedom of sartorial expression; something to be found elsewhere only (in my experience) in my other home, London. Spending a lot of time thinking about clothes, however, is frowned upon. Yet it is something I still do. To the delight of friends around me who seem to enjoy my excesses of flamboyant dressing.
Now broken hearted and skint, I have nothing to do, but look into my soul and pour out even more of myself into the fashions I wear. Stress relief it is, and without it, I would feel less in control, less able to keep on day to day.
A potted history: a girl met a boy, girl and boy bond through times of trouble through mutual respect and bloody good sex. they are complete opposites, but while together, living nearby, they work. very well. yet when university separates them six hours apart, the differences shine through, and the relationship fails at this new hurdle. boy is hurt when girl finishes it, but less than two months later takes up with new girl - whom old girl feels is skinnier and prettier than she (being a size 12-14, 5"9, rather striking, but certainly not pretty girl of 19). old girl knows that she must rise above hurt and strike out anew. there has always been a passion for aesthetics, clothing, art, drama and other varying delights of the visual variety, but now she is spurred on.
One thing boy used to say he loved, was that girl didn't dress like everyone else, had her own style, and the confidence to carry it off.
In these times of stress not only from the breakdown of a relationship which kept me going over a very difficult period in my life, but also from an incredibly large amount of work as yet undone, I intend to make every day a happy one, and one, not small element of this, will involve armour plating in the form of style, grace and fortitude.

Now that that's over, I can quickly summarise my style and what I seek...

Eccentric, changeable magpie. Fond of bright colours, but not if they are going to show up sweat stains. Wears dresses as often as possible. Sworn of trousers due to figure.
Thrifter, ebayer, passionate clothes historian. Theatre costumier. Never without lipstick, mascara and concealer.
Balances out strong features with stong clothes and strong attitude.
Bolshy, emotional and confident on the surface. Mass of nerves, worrier, highly emotionally fragile ME sufferer underneath who used to say sorry at the end of every sentence.
Respected by friends for direction, hard-work (not neccessarily on academia) and confidence to wear things which are not the norm.
Can't say no. Spends money like water. Spoilt by well off parents before university. Now finding it difficult to budget with clothing binge to balance emotional upheaval habit.
Quicksilver style, Large breasts, thighs and booty. Nice hands and decolletage. Fondness for metallics, summer dresses and belts.

xxx